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Do you have things that you postpone again and again, even for years, till you end up with a huge to-try list? After surviving meningitis this year I catch myself daring more things and trying things I’ve always wanted to do but never had the time, energy or money to. Of course, withing my healing process limits.

One of those things I wanted to try is making my own apricot stone liqueur. I’ve always loved baking, making jam and preserving fruit. It is in my culture, I guess, and in our family too. My mom would make and still makes all kinds of jams, marmalades, spoon sweets (glyko tou koutaliou). Filling pots with apricot jam, sweet vyssino (sour cherry), sweet neratzi (bitter orange) and anything you can imagine. Every year when she comes to visit us here in the Netherlands, small or big colourful jars pop up from her suitcase to bring us all the wonderful flavours from Greece. Of course, nostalgia hit my soft spot and I remember all the moments, stories, smells and tastes.

 

Every summer I remember my grandmother having somewhere in the garden (in front of the big bedroom window to be precise) a glass container with apricot pits that seemed to disappear somewhere around August. I remember my father saying how his grandmother would smash those little pits and make liqueur out of it and how amazing the smell of the little kernels inside was. I believe it is still one of his favourite smells. We had broken some pits together and I remember the unbelievable smell and the really bitter taste of those smooth little white kernels.

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I never tried this liqueur since I was only a child and I never really experiences this ritual of breaking the pits to reveal all those little noyax- as this is their name. But, every time I eat a fresh apricot I always find it such a pity to through away this little «box» with the hidden treasure inside.

So this year I decided to give it a try and make my own noyax liqueur. In honour of my grandmother and great grandmother (and theia Mina of course).

But first I need to collect enough, around 60 which shouldn’t be too difficult as we love them..

 

What does your to-try list look like? Mine has many more things on it, but I guess one has to start somewhere.

Wish me luck!

Panagiota

 

Today I sobbed under the shower. It is a lovely Thursday morning, my 4 year old son is at school and my 8 month baby daughter is at the daycare. We got them ready in the morning, my husband brought them and continued to his work. I had an antibiotics pill, then a silent breakfast and could rest a bit more. It was a good day and then it got me.. the memory of one of our last happy days before meningitis. I write it now and tears are difficult to hold back. I even have a photo of me with the two of them, my baby nursing and my son hugging both of us. A lovely moment. I knew I had to take a photo of us cause it was such a precious moment. I’m so thankful I did.

When I returned home, after two weeks in the hospital, I did try to breastfeed my baby girl again but it was too much, too difficult for both of us. She was confused and hurt and I was confused and broken.

Breastfeeding has been so important for me and my son and the first six months of my daughter’s life. And yet I convince myself that it is ok now, she is happy with the formula milk and we still get to hug and sing, she still sleeps in my arms and most importantly she still has a mother. I am alive. It’s just that sometimes the pain of this sudden separation becomes more clear, more sharp and among the other things I went through these last months, this is also hurting me.

I am happy and thankful that I am alive. I am happy and thankful to God that he brought me back to my husband and children. I am happy and thankful that I can walk again, talk again, breath and smile. I am thankful that I can now shower unassisted. But still the burden of this excruciating illness is here. The hearing loss is always here-thankfully only from the one ear. The weakness is here. The different looks on other people’s faces are here.

Lord, Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.

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lovely wishes at my hospital room

I cried today in the shower. And my soul needed it. A cleansing from inside. Water and tears. I can go on, I know I can.

 

I share a lot of things with my sister Marietta,
one of which is our love for crafts.!!
We love to crochet, knit, sew, embroider and more!!

We are a team, we are called Double Crochets.
We crochet at the strangest places around Athens,
and we have a crochet-knitting club,
our goal is to spread the word or let’s better say
«spread the thread».

I proudly present to you our blog:
Double Crochets 

we both love the internet, but marietta loves it more

we both love yarn, but panagiota loves it more

we will spin a yarn through our blog…
follow us!

picture by xkcd

τους τελευταίους μήνες,
τόσα αλλάζουν,
φίλοι πήραν πτυχίο,
άλλοι τοποθετήθηκαν σε τάξεις σε σχολεία σε τρίτες, τετάρτες, έκτες
και άλλοι περιμένουν να τοποθετηθούν,
άλλοι παντρεύτηκαν,(ομολογουμένως πολλοί μου φίλοι ανήκουν σε αυτή τη κατηγορία )
και άλλοι έκαναν ένα άλλου είδους νέο ξεκίνημα, με νέα πετάγματα μακρυά από τα γνωστά και τα τετριμμένα,
άλλοι πάλι είναι ακόμα στο «περίμενε» με τις δικές τους αλλαγές μικρές και εξίσου ουσιαστικές,

για να δούμε που θα βγάλει αυτός ο δρόμος που λέγεται ζωή?

οι γύρω μου αλλάζουν και τους χαίρομαι γιαυτό,
νέα πράγματα ξεκινούν, κύκλοι κλείνουν άλλοι ανοίγουν με κέντρο τη χαρά τη συγκίνηση την φιλία.

αγαπημένη φίλη ήρθε στην ορκωμοσία
και με καμάρι δέχτηκε το πτυχίο της με το μωρό στην αγκαλιά,
προκαλώντας συγκίνηση, δάκρυα χαράς και χειροκροτήματα υπερηφάνειας με το πρόσωπο του αγαπημένου της συντρόφου να ακτινοβολεί από ευτυχία.

Αγαπημένη φίλη έφυγε για Μυτιλήνη με μια βαλίτσα γεμάτη όνειρα 
στο λιμάνι γινήκαμε μαζί δυο φιγούρες αγκαλιαστές
με μάτια να γεμίζουν χαρά, δάκρυα, συγκίνηση και αγάπη

αγαπημένη φίλη παντρεύτηκε τον εκλεκτό της καρδιάς της σκορπίζοντας ελπίδα εδώ κι εκεί απλόχερα και δεχόμενη ευχές καρδιακές για βίον ανθόσπαρτο και όμορφες στιγμές.

αγαπημένη φίλη ολοκλήρωσε τις σπουδές της και κάνει αιτήσεις για αναπληρώτρια με την ελπίδα για μια όμορφη αρχή γεμάτη περιπέτειες και αισιοδοξία και πολλές ευχές να τη συνοδεύουν

αγαπημένοι μου άνθρωποι ζουν και χαίρονται και συνεχίζουν

τους ευχαριστώ για τις στιγμές που μοιράζονται μαζί μου
τους ζητώ συγγνώμη για τις στιγμές που μοιράζονται μαζί μου
τους αγαπώ για τις στιγμές που μοιράζονται μαζί μου

και κάπως έτσι καμαρώνω για τους γύρω μου,
και κάπως έτσι τελείωσα τη σχολή μου,
κάπως έτσι λέγομαι πια δασκάλα,
κάπως έτσι η ζωή μου επιφυλάσσει στιγμές που δεν περίμενα,

κάπως έτσι ΖΩ κι εγώ!

plagal is back in Canada..

canada

from XKCD

See you soon brother! : )